Confused

I thought something ordinary is the key to make myself happy. Until someone told me it is not, at least to me, to a dreamer. I was shocked. I was and am so confused. I looked back. I skipped the emotion parts, just looked at what makes me happy and fulfilled the most. It is a quite challenging process. But I somehow start to get something from the contemplation. How ordinary is ordinary? Perhaps I am still right. I still want an ordinary life. But what ordinary life is what I look for? Is my ordinary life the same as others' ordinary life? What needs to be covered in my kind ordinary life? Does the ordinary equal to so so? I have no answers for other questions. But at least I know the answer for the last is a big no. A so so life is not what I want. The world is huge and filled with various excitement. I have just experienced a few. If the life expectancy extends to 80 years, then I shall not be in a hurry to be bound. I am not ready to go on to another stage even though the social norms told me I shall. But why I need to listen to the social norms? Why I need to be bound to them? I may just need a soul mate. Mind is full with thoughts. Thoughts are not clear though. Go back to the basics. I want to have soul mates. Maybe a soul mate can be with me to the end of the life. Maybe a soul mate can go on adventure with me. Maybe a soul mate will be there when the time is right. Maybe a soul mate will be developed to my Mr. Right. Too much uncertainty in my life and too little space in my brain. I am confused.